It’s a cool 93 today. Yeah, well at least it’s super humid too! So, those of you with your 75 and perfect you can kiss my ass.
Today is golf league day. I wish I was golfing instead of this, honestly. My wife is sick in bed and my nephew is a pain in my ass. He will not listen. He’s now being punished with a forced nap while I sit at the poolside bar with my MacBook writing this and his blog entry while drinking a few $6 Casa beers from Africa.
I knew bringing a kid to Disney World wouldn’t be a walk in the park for either of us since we are over 40 and don’t have kids. I just didn’t realize how quickly I would lose my patience! Day 1, wham, I lost it. I swear he and my border collie are twins. They both listen for about 2 seconds and go right back to doing what I just got done telling them not to do.
Today we were walking back to the monorail and we have these little battery powered fans that are kind of flimsy. He wanted to use it so I said ok and handed it to him. I turn around and he’s jamming his fingers into the fan blades which are not very strong and made of paper basically. Not wanting it to be ruined immediately I said “Michael, don’t put your fingers in there ever again.” He mumbled something and I turned around and kept walking. I looked back not 10 seconds later and he’s got his finger in there again!!!! WTF! I yanked it out of his hands and said “Are you deaf?” Then I told him that we were going swimming but now we’re not and he’ll just be sitting quietly in the room staring at the wall since he obviously can’t listen to anything anyone says.
This has been going on every 30 seconds since Sunday. I swear I’m going to take him to the pool and hold him under. I also learned that his favorite way to start a sentence is “I want”. Everything he says starts that way. I want this, I want that. I told him I want him to learn some freakin’ manners. He doesn’t even say thank you for anything. Drives me nuts. Wish I’d gotten permission to smack the shit out of him.
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4 comments:
Next time, get that in written form before taking him anywhere. Or at least forge it before hand just to threaten him with...
"don’t put your fingers in there every again.”"
Every? getting as bad as "I".
Tell Michael he will get his $20 when he gets back, good job!
every? I don't see that in the sentence that's posted.... besides, I was drinking and typing, you can't expect my usual perfection.
you and ur spouse made a wise decison not to have kids.
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